Mira Lee was born on January 1st, 2005. She was so beautiful. Whenever I held her she would just stare into my eyes forever. I can't exactly explain why, but to me she was so different than my other children were when they were babies.
She was very sweet, but preferred to be held by only mommy and daddy. My parents live only 1/2 an hour away and visit often, but each time Mira acted quite upset at their company. The first time mom babysat Mira she said Mira was fine as long as her head was turned away, but when she turned to look at mom, she would start crying all over. (I secretly loved the fact that Mira was so picky about us)
Anyone who has kids know, they grow so fast, especially in the first year, and Mira was no exception. Early in her seventh month I noticed a tooth peeking out, and within two weeks she had four, all on bottom. She loved to jump up and down while I held her sides, she grab at my face and hair in a little baby hug, and what delight she would have whenever her daddy got home from work. Mira was just starting to get up on all fours and rock back and fourth, not far from figuring out how to crawl, I couldn't wait. But it was not to happen.
After we had put all the kids to bed, my husband and I would often stay up till after midnight watching tv and the night of the 21st of July was no different. While I did think Mira had taken a long nap, I did not want to wake her, and figured she would sleep thru the night. My husband had put her to nap on our bed, and usually when that happened, he would get her up and put her back in her crib.
That night we didn't travel to bed till nearly 2 in the morning, and I told William to move her because he was able to do it with out waking her. But this time he sensed something was wrong right away and he gently pulled at her arm. She didn't move. He picked her up and cried out my name, I was standing at the door watching, waiting for him to put her in her crib so right away I saw something was wrong. I ran to call 911 and tried cpr while I waited for the ambulance, but she was not responding. The e.m.t.'s ran in and grabbed her and tried to recussitate her in the back of the ambulance, and while they did I called my sister and told her to come over and watch the kids while we went to the hospital.
I knew in my heart she was already dead but I tried to stay hopeful and just prayed over and over, begging the Lord to bring her back. They tried for nearly an hour, but she was gone. My husband and I held her for a while but I think I was already gone in my head. My spirit had fled so that the truth could not sink in. The week following I was just so numb, I felt like I was on some reality show that wasn't really real.
I am determined not to let her death be in vain although I can make no sense of it, and would like to start a group locally that serves to inform and provide support for other families who have had to endure a similiar tragedy, because I was so overwhelmed and lost, I had no clue how to handle somethings. (Such as whether or not to have her embalmed) I would also like to connect with the local hospitals so that a keepsake can be made immediately, (a handprint, for instance) and that they be given information in relation to local sids families groups, informative and helpful web sites, and facts. When I lost a son in 2001 at five months of pregnancy, I had no idea that local monument business would give a flat headstone at no charge for babies who pass before their first birthday. Now I know this is a common practice in many areas. Sids is a tragedy all around, but made moreso by lack of research and general knowledge concerning SIDS. No family should be blindsided where there IS help and support available. Please write if you are interested in helping me raise awareness or if you want to see about starting a group in your area. I am by no means an expert, but I know with each others help, we can make a difference in lives affected by SIDS.
Mira Lee, I love you so Wish I never had to let you go Think of you everyday, and hope you know I'd give it all to have another go But I know your happy where you are So instead I wish upon a star That I remember, no matter how far Your always with me, Forever in my heart.
It's the quiet moments, that I think of you most Memories steal upon me like a ghost They whisper your name, and show me your face They remind me of my loss, and remind me of your place They remind of times, I thought wouldn't end So I barely remember a time before then Faintly I hear your laugh, Faintly I feel your touch They Remind me of how I miss you so much How I want to hold you, I'd never let you go I'd carry you everywhere, so everyone would know How I loved my sweet Mira, how they should too She's such a sweet blessing, and not everyone knew What a loss the world bore, when my sweet angel left Took a piece of my heart, and now I'm bereft But I remind myself, that one sweet day I'll once again hold her and face to face say Mira, Mira,.. Sweet Mira Lee We're together again and forever we'll be!!
Love you Mira Lee,. My sunshine
I want to add also the memory of a son that died while still in my womb, and whom I delivered on June 11th, 2001. Isaiah Mailin Edwards. Born Into Heaven, to suffer no more.
If tears could build a stairway, and Memories a Lane
I'd walk right up to Heaven, and bring you home again.
Shes so beautiful! / Renee Sosa (friend from cafemom )
Im so very sorry for your loss of precious Mira. Shes a beautiful baby girl and I can tell from your pictures that she was loved very much.
You made her a beautiful memorial and I cried looking at it.
I too lost a baby girl my angels name is Joanna...
hey blue bird / Tracey Edwards (Mira's Mommy )
Hey there Sunsine. so nice to see your pictures and be reminded of what a sweet angle I was able to hold for seven months. Things here are really good. I wish you were here but I know your spirit is in everything we do. and in Eden.
Josh Groban / Cassandra Nunn (potential cafemom friend )
You who dwell in the shelter of the Lord Who abide in His shadow for life Say to the Lord "My Refuge My Rock in Whom I trust." And He will raise you up on eagle's wings Bear you on the breath of dawn Make you to shine like the sun And hold ...
She will be remembered / Sylvia A. (CM friend )
Such a precious girl. I couldn't even look at all the pictures right now because it's kind of overwhelming. My heart goes out to your family. Even though she had to go to heaven early. I can invision your ancestors playing with her and having a ...
Such a sweet,lovely little girl.... / Angel Smith (none)
She was such a beautiful child...she was soo lucky to have a family that obviously loved her..
I lost my son when i was 7mon.pregnant with him...you were lucky to have her in your arms;in your lives,as was she....God Bless,and Godspeed!
Not In Vain As of right now, Mira's legacy, or what I want her legacy to be is in the "I'm gonna do it" stage. As stated in her story,. this tragedy has brought to my attention the lack of support and information available for other families who have lost a child,. at least in this area. My intent is to contact hospital administrators here in my city to find out locally how often an infants death is attributed to SIDS so that I may type up an information packet for those families. I would also like have keepsake kits that are either donated or that I buy myself can be in place for these situations. My idea is a clay-type kit that I saw at Walmart, where you can make an imprint of the childs hand and/or foot, and then take it home and bake it. After Mira died,. I read on sidfamilies where some other mothers had something similiar done, and I requested the funeral home do it but they could not because of her state at that time. I know that some mothers also later regretted not having gotten a lock of hair. There are many things that obviously you can not be prepared for when you lose a child, but I hope to at least ease some of the burden by offering these services and information that was not available to me when my Mira died. I was questioned by a social worker that morning,. and my children were questioned the next day,.but never was I offered services for counseling or therapy. This is a travesty and I hope that I get off my butt and start a movement that will change the state of affairs, at least locally, for families who unfortunately will surely face the same terrible situation that we did in the early hours of July 22nd, 2005. I will update regularly on this page so that you may follow my quest. Thank you to everyone who visits Mira's page,. lights a candle for her,. and sends prayers and support to our family,. we are all extremely grateful.